Nursing Home Decision

Making the nursing home decision for your parent or other loved one can be one of the most emotionally-charged decisions you’ll ever make

Taking the decision to put your elderly loved one into a Nursing Home is a huge undertaking and of course, not one to be treated lightly. Think of it this way, as the old quote says, "Do unto others as they would do to you". In other words, try and treat those around you as you yourself would wish to be treated. Quite rightly whatever decision you make now will have a long term effect on both the person concerned and those around them.

It is the sheer scale of taking care of the elderly that may prompt you to review the situation and make the decision to choose a nursing home. A decision such as this will probably be one of the most difficult decisions you will ever take in the whole of your life. Whatever you decide will obviously have a major impact on your elderly relative's quality of life left. This decision is very important and sensitive and everything about the welfare of your loved one depends on it.

Unfortunately the decision to put someone into a nursing home is not only governed by what may serve them best. The decision must also take into account the cost, availability and proximity of the nursing home as opposed to continuing to take care of them in your own home.

Most of the time these factors will determine whether your loved one requires a nursing home or not. Do not ever feed guilty or ashamed that you are thinking about sending your loved one to a nursing home. You are taking this decision because you love them and want whatever is best for them. However, you do need to find out as much as possible about the different types of nursing home that there is before proceeding any further.

Sometimes there’s guilt on behalf of the family members and caregivers who feel as if they’ve failed their loved one. This is compounded by outsiders who make comments about "dumping" a loved one at nursing home. Worse yet, we hear horror stories in the news about the worst of the worst elder care facilities, where abuse of the residents and theft seem to be the norm.

And yet there comes a time when the family cannot care for their ailing loved one, and they’re running out of options. Children can’t just quit their jobs to care for a parent. Due to financial constraints it’s sometimes hard for a child to move their parents into their household, especially if the parent requires some sort of in-home care from a hired professional.

Even putting financial burdens aside, if the parent requires a lot of care it can be extremely stressful for the family member who takes on the roll of care giver. Indeed, in some cases the loved one may be in such ill physical or mental health that it’s dangerous for them to remain at home.

Naturally this is also very stressful for the loved one, who may dread being put into a nursing home…and yet not want to be a financial or emotional burden to their children. Or perhaps the loved one needs care, but the children are spread all over the country.

In short, trying to come to grips with the nursing home decision can cause depression, anger and despair – for both the family and the loved one. But in many cases when it’s the last resort, it’s a decision that the whole family must make sooner or later.

• What is a Nursing Home
  
  What is a nursing home? A nursing home is a place for people such as the infirm and elderly who need help to undertake basic living needs
• The Right Time for a Nursing Home
  
  The right time for a Nursing Home? When to consider putting a loved one in a nursing home.
• Nursing Home Objections
  
  Overcoming nursing home objections